FIRST MAJOR STUCK/PB in 11 months

As I have written about I have been struggling with restriction - not even knowing if I really had a band in there since I had been able eat anything with no real problems.   Well. . . . . NOT ANYMORE! 
If you read a couple of posts ago I had gone for a fill early last week and have been noticing restriction and have had to be much more careful than anytime in the previous 11 months. 

Last night I had a truly terrifying and unbelievably uncomfortable experience.   I am back in Bermuda for two days for business.  I was at a BBQ at a colleagues house with a couple other business/friends.  This man is an incredible host.  He has a beautiful home and is a real wine lover.  He opened up these amazing bottles of wine for us to taste.  I was fine with the wine and even had a couple pieces of cheese but when we started dinner - which was fabulous steak and sides - I got more stuck than ever.  I just had a few bites of steak but I didn't chew well enough.  And then I tasted this au gratin potato and that was it.  I took my cell phone and said I had to go check on my kids.  Went to the bathroom and immediately texted Nicole from Better Banded who advised me to make it all come up.  So I did. . again, and again, and again. . .and everytime I thought it was done I had to get back up and go back to the bathroom.  I have never experienced anything like this.   

Finally I told my host - who is a colleague/friend that I was just going through period of getting hot and must be having a flash from early menopause.  It was better than the alternative. . .I got food stuck in my lapband.  He was so nice about it and since I had lost my voice from my Christmas party the other night - everyone else just assumed I wasn't feeling well.  

So we left and I was so disappointed to not drink more of the amazing wine but that is just a sidenote. . .in the cab back to the hotel and it is still coming up.  I wisely sat in the front and bought napkins with me but I couldn't make it back to the hotel.  Had to get out of the cab on Front Street -and proceeded to PB again. 

Finally - I felt better.  So embarrassed though.  I just can not believe how violent this episode was.  It has changed everything and now I am once again very afraid of my band (as I was at first when I didn't know its limits). 

This morning I did manage to get a protein shake down and I am not hungry!  I think this new restriction is a function of my recent fill and also some stress - have been going through au pair issues once again which I will post about another time - and also other things with year-end at work.  Nothing I can't handle but it was a tough day/weekend before this happened. 

I have to say that after not feeling much restriction or benefits from the band for the last year - I am happy that I went through this.  I feel like it is giving me renewed hope that with the help of this tool I can finally lose the weight. 

Hope everyone is having a good week and I promise to update soon! 

xoxo Susan

Bermuda Black Tie Event! Fill seems to be working. . . motivation back!

Hi everyone!  I am committed to blogging more to keep me on track and excited.  Especially by reading about all your success stories!  So inspiring to see Nora so close to Onederland and Ronnie so close to goal.  I am not going to let it depress me that I was banded around the same time as them (same date as Ronnie) and sit here only 30 lbs down.  I was at 42 down back in April/May but then gained some.  I know that I just can't give up.  And working with a new practice that is much closer to follow-up with fills is already making a difference.  I have been starting to feel like a weight loss surgery failure.  But I am really trying so hard to remember what I said at the beginning of this journey - that "Failure is Not an Option!"

I am down in Bermuda and it is a gorgeous day here.  Around 70 and Sunny.  Tonight is my firm's Bermuda Office Christmas Party which is a big Black Tie event at a Hotel.  I have never been because I technically work for the U.S. division but since I had a meeting here this morning I decided I would stay.  I bought a new Tadashi long dress that I am actually looking forward to wearing with my Spanx of course.  I will try to upload a picture from my iPad later. 

I have been staying away from alcohol and salt all week so that I will feel better in the dress tonight and I think it is working. 

Bye for now. . . I will be back soon. 

xoxo  Susan